FAQs | Not a Date

FAQ

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General Questions

What makes Not a Date different to all the other singles clubs I’ve joined?

We hear your frustration! We know you’ve been let down, disappointed, ghosted, scammed or worse. Our number one priority is your safety and security. Everything we do has that at its heart. Being a singles’ club rather than a dating club takes all the pressure off and just makes it fun.

We know that the best, long-lasting relationships start with friendship anyway. So just come and make friends!

What we are:

A singles’ club that uses face-to-face exclusive experiences and events to give members a platform to meet, engage, and make new friendships with both the same and opposite sex in a safe environment, without the pressure of dating.

What we are not:

A networking group
A dating app
A sleazy, seedy site that swaps member profiles
Mysterious meetups
Posh or pretentious

How does the club work?

If your application is successful, you will be invited to attend our monthly meetups, which to begin with are in Birmingham. Here, you will be introduced to like-minded members in a relaxed, no-pressure environment. You will have an online profile, but only as a reference point for other members: no-one can contact you directly. You will also be able to book onto extra events that we put on, such as yacht days, days at the races etc. We want to bring joy to your social life - and organise it all for you.

How thorough is the application and vetting process and what safeguards are in place once I am a member?

Your safety and security are our number one priority.

We make no apology for our comprehensive application process! Everything is read by humans and followed up with a camera-on Zoom call. You are asked to online verify your identity using third party security. We also insist that you have a social media account of some kind which we will access to fact-check.

Once someone is a member, we actively encourage negative feedback to us: if someone is hassling you, rude to you, ghosts you or exhibits any other undesirable behaviour, we will take you seriously, look into it, and potentially expel that member.

We operate a ‘badge’ system on our profiles so that you know a person has attended an event (so has been personally met); has received positive feedback from other members etc.

What sort of people are members?

The only common denominator is that everyone is single. Other than that, they are looking for fun and friendship with like-minded people - just remember they will have all been through our application process – and we’re quite picky…!

Joining and Membership

What is included in the membership?

12 months membership to an exclusive private members’ club
2 monthly meetups* at no additional charge, including drinks and canapés
A calendar of organised events and experiences at your disposal
Access to any events across the UK
Concierge service - researched and recommended with member rates on hotels.
An ever-growing member benefits program to enhance single life
Weekly news updates

*T&Cs apply

What does the application process involve?

Once you fill in the contact form, we will send you an application form.
We will also ask you for your social media details and ask you to complete a third-party ID check with a passport or driving license (at our cost).
Once this has been checked and verified you will be invited to a Discovery virtual meeting where we can find out all about you.
A final form tells us all about what you like to do, what you're looking for, and what interests you.
Great! You’re a member! Now on with your profile and let’s get you booked onto your first event!

Are there different levels of membership?

No. We know how frustrating it is to pay an amount and then be told that you need to upgrade to gain access to X, Y and Z. You pay one membership fee. You pay per event. That’s it.

Do I have to be fully divorced to join?

In theory, yes. But we understand that some situations are complicated, so explain it to us and we’ll see…!

I’m LGBTQ+, can I join?

Of course! We are a club based on friendship after all!

I’m not on social media; will that stop me joining?

Usually, yes. In this day and age, it is quite rare to not have any social media presence. We need to be able to verify you and this is the easiest and most comprehensive way to do that. However, explain it to us, we’re reasonable people.

Can I try before I buy?

Our vetting and application process is so important for the safety and security of our members that the only way you can attend an event without being a fully signed-up member is by coming along as the guest of a current member who can vouch for you.

Will other members be able to contact me directly?

Not through us. We will never share your details. It is entirely up to you if you wish to exchange details with someone you meet at an event.

Join before 14th May and receive 50% off your membership fee

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Pricing

How much does it cost?

We have one, standard annual membership fee which is payable either up front, or on a monthly basis (it’s cheaper to pay it in one go, but we do offer a 12-month subscription).

You get two free meetups* within your year, and then each monthly meetup is charged at a reduced member fee.

Extra events (yacht days etc) are payable on booking but are entirely optional. These events will vary in price depending on their costs and inclusions. All details will be available to you before you book or pay.

Click here to see our up-to-date prices and offers

*T&Cs apply

What is included in the cost of membership?

Ongoing access to our exclusive, closed member events
2 monthly meetups at no additional charge
2 personalised introductions per event
Help in creating a member profile. This is a reference profile only – we do not facilitate direct communication with other members – no left/right swiping here.
Weekly news updates
Option to attend extra, special events

Can I pay monthly?

Yes.

If you would like to pay monthly, you sign a contract agreeing to pay your subscription charge every month for the full 12 months. Cancellation before the full amount is paid will result in recovery. There is more information on this in our terms and conditions.

Events

When and where are the monthly soirees held?

Our Birmingham events are held on the same Saturday of
every month at St. Paul’s House. Details of future events will all be visible within your
member area and available for you to book once you’re a member.

We have a robust roll-out plan for the rest of the UK – watch this space!

What happens at the monthly meetups?

Drink & canapés; hosts introducing you to like-minded members; low-key background music to enable decent chatter; optional conversation prompts, all within a cool, safe, vibrant environment. The events will run from 7-10.30pm.

What considerations have you made for my safety at an event?

We have personally visited and chosen venues based on the area they are in. Is there good street lighting? Decent and nearby parking? In a good area? Only once we would be happy to walk to our car or the station late at night do we book it and invite you.

Once at an event, we provide everyone with a welcome drink and then 3 drinks tokens. The purpose of the tokens is to help you navigate drinks etiquette: “can I buy you a drink?” Do I have to accept that drink? Should I offer to get a round in? This system keeps it fair, and safe for everyone. Problem solved.

Can I bring a single friend of mine along for support/to see if they might join?

You can bring guests as long as you vouch for them. You need to be 100% sure that they are a. single and b. honest/trustworthy. Each guest (we call them your wing men or wing women!) can only attend once without joining.

Do I have to come to monthly meetups?

No, of course not! You can pay your membership and never come to anything. But there would really be no point. We are all about human interaction; if you don’t come
to the events, there is no other way of contacting our members. To optimise your chance of making connections, we would suggest you come to as many as you can.

What other kind of experiences are on offer?

Other experiences on offer range from:

Music events
Horse racing
Fashion-inspired events
Dance classes
Food-inspired events
Private dining
Wine tasting, cocktail making, beer tasting, vineyard tours
Super, sports and classic cars
Weekends away
Planes, trains and yachts
Learning skills
Polo, shooting and country pursuits
Competitive group activities
Wellness

All are varying prices and inclusions with something to suit every budget. These will be available to book once you are a member.

Do I have to sign up for the extra events?

Not at all, they are above and beyond your ‘standard’ membership, but they are a great opportunity to get to know people on a deeper level. They are generally things you might really want to do anyway – like a tour of a Royal palace or VIP tickets to a concert. All the costs and inclusions will be available on our website, so you know exactly what you’ll be getting.

How do I book?

Once you are a member, you have access to the members’ area of the website. Here is where you’ll find all our future events and you can book and pay there.

What should I wear to an event?

Just be yourself. It’s an evening drinks do, so just come however you would like people to see you.

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Stay connected

Contact us

Mobile: 07762 708557

Email: hello@notadate.co.uk

Not a Date Ltd
Onyx House
Avenue Close
Birmingham
B7 4NU

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