Dating after being widowed…

Advice for those who are widowed, and just remember, everyone’s journey is different:

• Give yourself time. There’s no rush. Making new friends is just as important as dating. Old friends may remind you of your partner, and reminiscing about old stories constantly may not be helpful.  Finding new friendship groups can really help as there is no history. Concentrate on making new memories, learning new skills, and making new friends. Take everything at a pace that you’re comfortable with.
• Don’t compare. Every relationship is unique and must be judged on its own merits. 
• Consider your family. Although you may be ready to move on in some way, your family (or your late partner’s) may not be, and they may not react in the way you expect. No one is wrong; the grieving process is different for everyone. 
• We only remember the good stuff. Putting your partner on a pedestal is only natural, it’s part of the grieving process to remember the good times and qualities of those we lose, but that pedestal can be hard to live up to for a new partner. So, try to appreciate a different set of personal qualities in someone new.
• You deserve to be happy. Try to focus on yourself and be patient with yourself and others. 
• Try something different. It’s hard not to live in the past, as that may be the last time you felt happy, so trying new environments with new people will all help.

Don’t try too hard. There are no set timelines on anything, and putting pressure on yourself too early can set you back. Go at your pace, don’t set rules, and don’t be hard on yourself.